No Velvet
by FenMoon
Summary: Sakura has her own idea of romance, and Naruto doesn't get what's so great about it. KibaNaru yaoi


**Disclaimer: I don't own the Naruto series, or any of the characters within this story. Really, though, would you want me to? Also, this story focuses on a romantic relationship between two teenage boys; if this upsets you in any way, shape or form, feel free to leave. That is all.**

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No Velvet

"Alright, that's it for today. I'll see you all bright and early tomorrow morning, then."

And with that, Hatake Kakashi disappeared in a cloud of smoke, leaving his three charges in the center of the village. The first thought that entered all of their heads was a unanimous _yeah, right_. All three of them had been under Kakashi's tutelage long enough to know that "bright and early" actually meant a little after noon. Their next thoughts were what they were going to do for the rest of the night. This time, their thoughts differed.

Sasuke was the first to act. He silently turned on his heel and began to walk off without a word. Before he could leave, though, Sakura called out to him. "Hey, Sasuke, do you want to do something with me tonight? Maybe just the two of us?"

"…No." Sasuke didn't even turn around to respond. He just kept walking towards the general direction of his home.

Sakura sighed gloomily as she watched her crush turn the corner and leave her line of sight. Sure, this had happened over a hundred times already, but being rejected by Konohagakure's number one hottie never seemed to get easier.

Naruto, of course, had to add his own two cents. "I don't see why you're so upset. Doesn't this happen every time?"

Sakura growled at him, partially because she was wasn't currently in the mood for it, partially because what Naruto said was true, and partially because it was Naruto who said it. "Shut up Naruto! It isn't the same at all! This time, he actually _said_ no. He used to just leave without saying anything. He's warming up to me!"

Naruto would have commented with something witty, but the growl from earlier had unnerved him somewhat. He had to remember that Sakura was both willing and able to kick his ass if she felt that he was out of line. Naruto _really_ didn't want another bruise today, so he decided that the smart thing would be to keep his mouth shut.

"I still don't see what's so great about that teme, anyways."

Okay, that one slipped out. It wasn't as if Uzumaki Naruto was known for doing the smart thing anyways.

Fortunately for Naruto, Sakura opted for condescending rather than physical punishment tonight. "Hmph. You are so clueless when it comes to romance, Naruto. Anyone can see that Sasuke and I are absolutely perfect for each other."

This time, Naruto was able to bite back the comment involving Yamakana Ino that came to mind. Instead, he decided to try to keep her talking, if only to prevent a concussion. "How are you so sure?"

"Why, can't you see it?" Sakura then clasped her hands together and became starry-eyed as she began to fantasize. "I can just see it now. He'll approach me on an elegant white horse, dressed in the most beautiful velvet robes. He'll give me a beautiful bouquet of roses, and offer me his hand to help me up on his steed. We'll look into each other's eyes, and see the pure love we both feel for each other. Then, I'll join him on his horse, and we'll ride off into the sunset, our hands…" Naruto didn't hear the rest, because he had decided to take the opportunity to leave while Sakura wasn't paying him any attention.

Naruto sighed as he walked the streets to his own home. Fantasizing was good and all, but didn't Sakura think that that was a bit much? Even if Sasuke did choose to make Sakura his girlfriend (and right now, that was a very big if), there was no way that he was going to do so by that horseback scene she had described. Hell, Naruto wasn't even sure if Sasuke knew how to ride a horse. Even if he did, Naruto didn't think it'd be the way Sakura was thinking. Naruto saw him on some menacing beast as black as coal, wearing a blood red cape like some evil overlord and carrying something long and with a sharp point as the horse walked over the corpses of his enemies.

Naruto entertained the thought of Sakura cuddling with _that_ for the rest of the walk back to his apartment. All thoughts of horses vanished, however, when he reached his door and found it ajar. Admittedly, Naruto could be very scatterbrained about things, but not once in five years had he ever forgotten to lock his door. Something was amiss.

Naruto pulled a kunai out from the pack on his leg as he slowly opened the door. Silently, he walked into the apartment. From what he could see, everything was undisturbed. Nothing had fallen on his head as he had opened the door, so this probably wasn't a prank. He almost wished it were; getting angry at some brat was better than preparing for a life-or-death confrontation any day. Naruto closed his eyes. He didn't sense anything off, but he could faintly hear something. It sounded sort of like…snoring?

Whatever it sounded like, it was coming from the living room. Naruto crept into the room. The sound was getting louder, and seemed to be coming from the couch facing away from him. He cautiously approached the couch in question—only to relax and stand up straight when he noticed a familiar fur-lined hood hanging off the edge. He walked the rest of the way, no longer hiding his moves, and sure enough, Inuzuka Kiba was sprawled out on his couch, fast asleep. His head was laid atop the armrest, and one leg dangled off the edge of the cushions. What space on the couch not taken up by Kiba was being used by Akamaru, the small dog curled up at his master's feet.

Naruto sighed in annoyance as he put away his weapon. Damn mutt had nearly given him a heart attack! As he looked over the boy, though, a wicked grin slowly spread across his face. Time for a little payback.

Naruto quietly nudged Akamaru. The puppy woke up groggily, and looked up at the one who had woken him from his nap. Naruto motioned for him to be quiet, then walked over to a closet. Akamaru left the comfort of the couch to follow him. The dog looked at Naruto curiously as he retrieved a medium-sized bucket, then watched as the human filled it with cold water, humming all the while. Before Naruto returned to the couch, he ran back as fast as his furry legs would take him, and leaped up on the nearby loveseat so that he could get a good view.

Naruto didn't feel an ounce of remorse as he dumped the water over Kiba. Nor did he try to hold his laughter when Kiba suddenly shot up, sputtering off curses and unfinished questions. All the while, Akamaru just yipped and barked happily, his tail wagging like crazy.

It took the soaked Kiba a good minute before he noticed Naruto standing there and laughing, and his eyes narrowed when he saw the bucket. It didn't take much to fill in the blanks. Kiba let out a low, guttural growl, but Naruto didn't even blink. "Serves you right, dog breath. It's not polite to break into someone's home, you know."

"I didn't break in, dumbass. I used the key you gave me."

"So? You still shouldn't be sneaking into people's apartments. Someone might think you're an assassin or something."

Akamaru made a few short barks. Naruto couldn't understand what the dog was saying, but he was guessing that he agreed, since Kiba was now glaring at his dog and calling it a traitor. Naruto watched as owner and pet continued to argue. He chuckled as Kiba began to become more irate, while Akamaru seemed to be perfectly calm. Kiba heard the chuckle and turned to face Naruto again. "Damn it, Naruto, this isn't funny! My clothes are soaked, and I don't have a clean change here right now."

"So take them off." Kiba blushed at that, and Naruto just grinned. "Oh, come on, Kiba, since when were you such a prude. It's not like I haven't seen it all before anyways. And, speaking of stripping down, I've had a long day, so I'm going to take a nice, hot shower. Make yourselves at home."

Kiba watched as Naruto walked into the bathroom. The taller boy sighed and began to pull off his wet clothes. "Tch. He calls _me_ a prude," he said as after his parka was over his head. Akamaru assumed that Kiba was talking to him, since there was no one else present. "He's the one that refused to let me see him without a damn shirt for a month after we started dating."

Naruto washed up quickly. Normally, he would have liked to take a longer shower, but he didn't think Kiba was above running the sink and turning the hot water freezing cold for a bit of revenge. He walked out of the bathroom into his bedroom, and threw on a blue t-shirt and a green pair of boxers. He walked back into the living room.

Kiba was now sitting in the loveseat, pouting at the TV in just his own brown boxers. Naruto wasn't sure if the sight of Kiba pouting was cute or slightly pathetic. Akamaru was back on the couch, on the small part that was still dry. Naruto was a little worried about water damage, but he figured that anything he could do to the couch wasn't nearly as bad as what the family of dogs had done to it. Most of his pieces of furniture were hand-me-downs from the Inuzuka compound. Hana had been appalled when she had seen that Naruto had only a table and bed in his apartment.

Naruto tapped Kiba on the shoulder. The brunette just looked up and glared at him. Naruto sighed. "Oh, come on. You're not still mad about the water, are you?"

"Yes," Kiba said as he went back to pouting. About a half a minute later of neither one of them moving, the answer became "Maybe." Another half a minute, and it turned into a begrudging "No."

Naruto chuckled softly. "All right, I'm sorry. Now make room so I can sit down."

"No way! There isn't enough room. Go sit on the couch."

"Are you kidding? It's all wet!"

"And whose fault is that?"

"Yours, 'cause you're the one who snuck in!"

Akamaru watched as the two humans started wrestling over the seat. If dogs could roll their eyes, he would.

Finally, Naruto made Kiba stop. He had Kiba sit in the seat and spread his legs apart. "Keep your mind out of the gutter, dog breath," he said when he saw Kiba blush. Naruto sat himself in between Kiba's legs and leaned back into his chest. He looked over his shoulder at Kiba. "This work for you?" Kiba nodded. Naruto just smiled, and snuggled more into his boyfriend's chest. Kiba responded by putting an arm around Naruto and pulling him closer.

After they both were comfortable, they turned towards the TV. "So," Naruto asked, "what are watching?"

"An old episode of _Astray_. That alright?"

"Sure." After that, both boys fell quiet as they watched the show. Every now and then, Kiba would rub up against Naruto, the same as how a dog would nuzzle up to its master. It was more of a reaction of Kiba's; most of the time, he didn't even realize he was doing it. Not that Naruto minded. He liked the feeling. It seemed romantic to him, a way to signify that Kiba was his and his alone.

_You are so clueless when it comes to romance, Naruto._

Naruto remembered what Sakura had told him earlier. He tried to imagine Kiba approaching him like Sakura had. He didn't like what he saw. Aside from the fact that Kiba would have looked ridiculous as some sort of Prince Charming, it really just didn't sit well with Naruto at all. He liked sitting back and watching TV with Kiba. He liked being able to pull pranks and fight with Kiba, and still be able to cuddle with him later. Naruto wanted what he had right now, not the white knight on horseback that Sakura did.

Kiba was taken by surprise when Naruto leaned back and pulled him into a kiss, but he recovered quickly and reciprocated. Naruto didn't hold anything back in the kiss, which only surprised Kiba more. When they finally pulled apart, Kiba looked down at the boy in his lap incredulously. "What was that for?"

Naruto just smiled. "For not wearing velvet."

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**A/N: I actually don't have anything to say for once. I just hoped that you all enjoyed reading this and would appreciate reviews. Thank you.**

**Oh, and by the way, about the TV show. _Astray_**** is a synonym for _Lost_****. Not that I particularly like the show myself, but I figured it'd be a good primetime show to mimic/parody/whatever you want to call it.**


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